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Here to make trouble, lose countless hours, and enjoy herself.
Mostly More than Meets the Eye/Transformers in General, Leverage, BTVS, Star Wars, Star Trek, LOTR, The Hobbit, Agents of Shield, Teen Wolf, Heroes, OUAT, and various comics with a lot of random bits and parts of other fandoms.
Eternal multishipper with an OT3 problem and AU junkie of the highest order. Meg Masters, Nyota Uhura, Eowyn, and Erica Reyes fangirl to the point of ridiculousness. Part of the Daisy Johnson protection squad.
I have a Whirl Problem.
Sorry not sorry.
Sorry about the excessive use of tags ahead of time. Also rambling. Also discussions of fanfiction. Yes. Social Justice Bard.
rather than death of the author i subscribe to a critical framework i like to refer to as Schrodinger’s Author where the authors intentions are important except for when i dont like them
If I’m somewhere where there are Educational Personell (Museum Docents, Q&A zookeepers, Park Rangers, Public School Teachers, Professors etc.) I have a question I like to ask them:
“What’s the weirdest question someone’s ever asked you?”
I say weird and not Dumb becuase even buckwild questions can have important answers, but whoever I ask it too usually has to think about it for a bit, then comes out with something different every time. And I love every single answer becuase it just warms my heart out there to know people are trying to understand the world a bit better, no matter how limited thier starting point. A collection of favorites so far:
Art Museum Host: “A man once asked me “Can you help me find someone and if you can’t can you find someone who can?” Which I always thought would be a great title for an Artwork.”
Park Ranger: “I’m so glad the Japanese couple asked me “Is bear spray like mosquito spray and it goes on the jacket, or on the bear?” instead of just trying it.”
Zookeeper: “A man once pointed at the live red-tailed hawk I had out for a demo and asked me “Aren’t those extinct?” We eventually figured out he meant “Endangered” but I hear that question every time I see a redtail now.”
Primary School Teacher: “About every other year a student asks me what part of the school I sleep in at night, because clearly I live here. I tell them I sleep under the bleachers in the gym but it’s actually the Nurse’s office.”
Professor: “A student asked me “So how do I use this in a conversation when my aunt is wine-drunk at thanksgiving and being a jerk again?” Which honestly is a fair question about philosophy and really changed how I teach rhetoric.”
Natural History Docent: “A woman once asked me what the difference between a Million and a Billion was. Kinda pieced together that she’d just left her church for her safety, and was learning about Earth’s Natural History for the first time. Nobody else was there because it had been snowing, so I walked her through the Hall Of Time and answered as many questions as I could. She was bewildered, but really trying. It always struck me as a really brave thing, to try to understand all of that while fresh out of a dangerous situation. I hope it helped.”
Forensic Scientist: “People ask me how to commit murder all the time, but if you really hate someone, stealing thier identity causes much more suffering and is a lot harder to get caught at. A guy did ask me if working at a body farm was creepy and did not like that it was ok until you learned that decayed human fingers are a deer’s favorite midwinter snack.”
Zookeeper: “People call us becuase they think they’ve found an escaped animal all the time, or they think they’re neighbor’s husky is a wolf. One guy asked me if his dog was part hyena because it had spots. But that one guy really did have a Tiger in his toolshed that one time so we try to take them seriously.”
Meteorologist: “A guy once emailed me about how hard you’d have to fan a tornado to make it start spinning in the other direction and included a picture of him holding up a box fan at an approaching tornado. We printed it out for the work fridge.”
Park Ranger: “I was giving a talk on the Yellowstone Supervolcano and a guy asked if, after it errupted, the earth would be ‘hollowed out’. I suppose I was just relieved that he understand that the earth isn’t flat.”
Primarcy Shcool teacher: “A student once asked me where she could sell her bones online so she could by a dog. Which? Same.”
Natural History Docent: “A guy asked us ‘If I had a time machine, and managed to kill and cook a T-Rex, what would it have tasted like?’ and every paleontologist on staff deciced to take him seriously. They did research to learn about fat distribution, and read up on culinary science to learn what flavors meat, even did chemical analysis on the bones. They concluded that it’d be Tough (no evidence of juicy fat pockets), bitter (carnivores tend to taste foul) and would probably kill him, because heavy metals travel up the food chain and T-Rex accumulated a lot of the cadmium that was in the dirt in the late cretaceous. Wrote him a letter with our findings and he sent us back a drawing of him and his buddies cooking a T-Rex over a fire and all of them throwing up and dying, and it’s my favorite drawing in the whole world.”
Wait, I don’t know the answer to the bear spray question.
Since several people have asked and I neglected to put the answer in the original post:
BEAR SPRAY, ALSO KNOWN AS “BEAR MACE” IS TYPICALLY A MIXTURE OF MACE, TEAR GAS AND OTHER SEVERE IRRITANTS, AND IS MEANT TO BE SPRAYED AT CHARGING BEARS. DO NOT SPRAY IT ON YOUR PERSON UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
Here is a Nice Video by Parks Canada on how to properly use Bear Spray:
Today we all learned something important becuase we asked! Good for us!
This guy knows what he’s talking about. He’s one of the lead writers for Leverage and if you ever watch the series on DVD, do yourself a favor and listen to him talk about how the scripts got written. Some of the advice he has is stuff I use all the time: 1. Don’t introduce an important plot person or thing after the first half of the story. 2. Always tie up loose ends. 3. Introduce important things in the middle of unimportant things. 4. If you have to infodump, find an emotion to tie it to and it will seem less like infodump and more like a motive rant.
like i’m sorry but these enormous metal robots so vast and powerful that they run on nuclear reactor cores welded into their chests can only be moved and controlled by the power of love??? how does that not drive you utterly insane just thinking about it???
pacific rim was really like “our giant monster-killing robots are powered by the tender, intimate, powerful connection of soulmates - romantic, platonic, or familial” and i’ve never recovered from how the sheer brilliance of that concept made me feel
when travis mcelroy said “what if you could just cut out the bullshit and do good recklessly?” and when marc evan jackson said “now go do something good” and when chidi anagonye said “i argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people” and when brennan lee mulligan said “you, mortal beings, are the instrument by which the universe cares. if you choose to care, then the universe cares. and if you don’t, then it doesn’t”
Yeah there’s an AU fanfic here where people with actual knowledge of how to handle captive animals run Jurassic Park and manage to get through the whole crisis with only two fatalities and the park still intact.
This t-rex is so happy to be tearing a car apart and pushing it over a cliff! She’s got so much energy! She needs healthy outlets! Where the fuck is her enrichment team???
Watching Jurassic Park and I have Opinions on this place as a zoo. Feeding the predators live prey?? There’s other ways to provide enrichment! Also that enclosure is way too small for multiple large animals like that! Electric fences? Ha! Electric fences won’t stop a fucking goat! Where’s the zoo experts? Who designed these enclosures?? Were all zoos this shitty in the 90s???
